Almost to the day of the 10th anniversary of Kim Kardashian’s infamous Superstar sex tape, celebrity sex videos were in the news again: Mischa Barton's ex had secretly filmed her during sex, and was, without consent, flogging the content to the highest bidder. This, just as Spice Girl Mel B reportedly won a court injunction to prevent estranged husband, Stephen Belafonte, from distributing theirs.
Three examples of the conflicting power of the sex tape. For Kim K, it propelled fame and netted a crisp $100 million (£78 million): her tape is still viewed somewhere in the world every 1.5 seconds, and reportedly earns Ray J – the lesser-known penis part – a tidy $90,000 (£70,000) every three months in royalties. Away from the bank, Mischa and Mel B face the darker side of the sex tape – gut-flipping betrayal or, at the very least, serious damage limitation.
Right now, making a sex tape has never been easier (thanks to tech), or more complicated. In January, YouTuber Lena The Plug told fans she’d post a sex tape if she reached 1 million subscribers. Where's the line between personal enjoyment and commercial gain? Isn’t a sex tape supposed to be about being horny, not humping up your 'likes'? (Lena didn’t hit the mill – but did get a big spike in followers).
Does an increasingly grey area between the personal and the promotional mean that being prudish is simply out-dated? Take Big Brother. A decade ago, Ofcom’s phones likely rang off the hook with complaints about the kind of nudity that we now see daily on Instagram. Today, a sex tape is almost a prerequisite to win in reality TV. It’s very easy to roll our eyes. But how about when the motivation for filmed sex is education not money? For example, the Tumblrs that show ‘real’ sex instead of porn’s inflated 13-inchers?
You only have to Google “watch revenge porn” to see that there’s still a devastating market
One of the hardest things to get your head around is that today’s sex tapes seem to have a role beyond the enjoyment of the people in them. Research by McAfee found that 50% of us store the sexts we receive. The dark side is that of the 1 in 10 ex-partners who threatened to leak risqué photos online, 60% actually did it. You only have to Google “watch revenge porn” to see that there’s still a devastating market for selling it.
That’s not to say that you should ban camera phones from ever entering your bedroom. Filmed with trustworthy company, and stored with you in control, it can be extremely sexy. (For reassurance, shoot without your face/ distinguishing marks on camera, and an old-school camcorder is less ‘spreadable’ than a cloud-connected phone – make sure you keep the video, not the other person).
More than ever, sex tapes are about sticking to your guns on what you feel comfortable with. In the past, that meant seeing your bum on a grainy screen. Today, it’s the possibility of seeing your bum go viral.
Here’s what five people who’ve played home sex-director advise…“If you 100% trust the other person, do it. If you have any hesitation at all, don’t. Not because they will betray you, but because the uncertainty will eat away at you.” Alex, 28
“My ex filmed me. I told him not to put my face in it, and he did exactly as I asked. We broke up years ago, but because I can’t be identified it doesn't bother me if he still has the video somewhere.” Mary, 30
“When I caught my long-term girlfriend cheating, one of the first things I did was erase my videos of her. I didn’t want to be the guy who got really drunk, really angry, and then posted them online.” Anthony, 29
“I worry that an ex still has some very explicit videos of me. I dread that I'll pop up on one of those sites, and there's nothing I can do about it.” Jenna, 29
“It was short – only a few minutes – but it made me start to like showing off my naked body. I felt confident and sexy. It's on my camera, so no one will see it, and I’d definitely do another for a bit of fun. I also found out that I had a big freckle on my bum.” Leigh, 27
Have a sex question or topic you'd like to know more about? Gemma would love to hear from you. Email her at glamoursexeditor@condenast.co.uk.
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